rjessome said:
And who said immigration can't be funny???? A little bit of "wit" goes a long way in surviving this process.
Certainly, without smiling, most of us would be in tears.
Anyone who wants to immigrate to Canada needs to be up to the challenge.
There are a lot of comments that can be used to describe the process and the system.
Some of the printable phrases are shown below:
Dealing with CIC is like trying to push jello up a drainpipe with a feather duster.
Originally all immigration documents and forms were written in Chinese, because even after translation the documents are just as inscrutable.
Calling the CIC helpline for a correct answer is like rolling a dice.
Trying to enter Canada before getting your PR, is also like rolling a dice - the difference is the dice has 64,000 sides, and once the dice lands, the IO can move it to any number they choose.
Gathering the correct information and answers for all the immigration forms is like herding cats.
If the immigration documents confuse you, tear them up and place them in a blender, switch it on for 5 minutes, relax with a good drink, pour the contents of the blender onto the floor and begin to read what you see - rest assured that it makes the same amount of sense before and after the process (the drink may help to decode the mess).
Give up reading when your drink has run dry, log in to the Canadavisa forum and ask any questions you can remember.
WARNING - Do this before starting the immigration process.
Before anyone starts the immigration process they should get a feel for what is in front of them - try the following tasks to simulate the process.
a) Rub vaseline in your eyes, so
nothing appears to be clear.
b) Wait at a bus stop on a -20C snowy night with a paper bag over your head, so you get used to the
isolation.
c) Order a hot chocolate at Timmies, but get them to serve you a coffee, so you know what
confusion and disappointment is.
d) Spend two weeks on the toilet with constipation, so you understand what
patience is.
e) Consume vast amounts of laxative, so you have to get up every five minutes for the next 36 hours, so you understand the meaning of
urgency.
f) Clean the calcium from a giant sized shower head with a pin, so you comprehend
frustration.
g) Set light to shoe box that contains an unknown amount of your money, so you grasp that you have
no control over what the process will cost.
h) Send your partner on a world cruise, while you walk the city streets at night suffering from
loneliness.
i) Mail a letter to your home from the northern side of the Ngorongoro crater, forget to use a stamp, spell your address incorrectly and miss out the post code, wait at home for the letter, embrace the feeling, it will show you
what it is like to wait for the return of your passport from a VO.
j) Visit the most dangerous place you can imagine, wear all your bling and carry all your cash in full view... The
fear you now have is similar to the feeling that you get when approaching a POE, or meeting an IO.
k) Attempt to juggle feathers and jello, it may start off well, but
you have to be someone very special to keep it all together for any length of time.
After a month of performing these tasks on a regular basis, sit down and consider what this could be like if it lasted 4, 5, 9 or even 18 months.
Now you are starting to comprehend the path that lies in front of you.
Understand that you need more than strength, more than courage, you need... a bit of insanity and a fair dose of commitment - it is your call.
I wish you luck and good fortune ;D
